Along the way I've seen friends divorce, and I've seen the toll its taken on them personally, their wife and kids.
Each day, I resolve to do whatever I can to keep my marriage strong. That means taking things one day at a time. Strategies that I have specifically used during the past decade that I think have helped include:
Not going to bed angry. Being willing to forgive and forget, even though I might be right. Avoiding temptation. Going to church together. Doing my part around the house (or whatever it takes). Hanging out with other couples with healthy marriages. Putting the toilet lid down (no kidding! Making time for each other, and getting out together for some fun. Taking all the kids once in a while so she can have some time to decompress or shop. Showing her my appreciation when she's not expecting it. If life should be better, it should be better for all of us, not just one of us.
I'm lucky that I met a great woman. She's a terrific mother, earns a good income, works hard, is faithful and reliable. I love her very much, and I want to keep her happy.
This hasn't been easy, though. It's truly something that I work at every day. It's hard work, but the rewards are worth it.
I can't say that something might not happen out of the blue, or that I'll fail somewhere along the way. Maybe we won't be married ten years hence. But today, I'm making plans for our future. I visualize being with her for the rest of my live. I see us taking fun vacations, saving for retirement, moving into a new house some day. Today we love each other, and today I'll work to make this marriage a relationship she'll value and want to continue in.
I love being married to my wife, and I'm glad that my kids have both of their parents meddling in their lives.
If marriage isn't working for you, I'm sorry. I hope it works out. I don't know what I can really say to you. Just know that it can be wonderful.
If you and I are not in the same place with our marriages, I encourage you to check out this article from AllProDad. Maybe you can find some good ideas here: